So it is the biggest sporting day of the year, well if your Irish or in Ireland it is at least.

Something you want to know more about, however your missing that little something that can help you in the conversations do not worry we can help you with our little guide. 

Pretend to know even more than you do

Shout out the following to your rivals ‘Ah here, sure what do you know?’

Does your pal remember certain years of the good years? Reply with this. 

It is all about form, and we sure as hell have it. 

Pick a name you can remember and just use that for most of the game. 

Your man “insert name here” is playing a blinder, man of the match by a country mile


3 gaa




Half Time

Congrats you have got to half time, now is the time you will need to ask questions and even answer some. This will help you survive the next 15 or so minutes. 

I think I will get a pint, anyone want one? This will allow you a few moments to listen to others in the stadium, or pub. Absorb in as much knowledge as you can by surrounding fans. 

We have them were we want them. Winning, losing or even drawing this will get you past the analysis of the arm chair managers. 

The lads need to dig deep, with a faster chap on the side we will win I am sure of it. We don’t need to explain this to you silly!!


Full Time

Your on your own for this one. Just enjoy the game and if you are struggling to make conversation after this, well we are sorry but your a no hoper. Only messing, buy a round of drinks  and cheer your team. You’ve won or lost but had the craic. 


Phrases to mention when possible 

Hit him = a tackle in Gaelic football

A fu@k off ref ya blind f*ck ya! = that ref missed something we all saw 

How on earth did he miss that? = a missed opportunity to score a vital point / goal 

2 gaa


Take your point and the goals will look after themselves = Put the ball over the bar to score 1 point. 

Get up the yard = yay

Fell free to send us what one’s you want to @comedyireland on twitter 


Enjoy the game folks,

Comedy Ireland



















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