Sean Hegarty

I couldn’t help but think over the weekend that if Man Utd were a country, the scumbags would probably win the Eurovision every year as well….

But what a player in Carlos Tevez….a lot of people emulate him by getting their name on the back of their shirts or trying to do his tricks…I went one better and poured a kettle of boiling water down my neck. Ouch!! Who know’s where that little pitbull will end up next season (hopefully Anfield) but anyway, Congrats to Utd, think they just about deserved to win it.

In odd news this week, a guy in Colorado was knocked off his motorcycle when a turkey flew right into his chest, knocking him clean into the air, landing him 25 feet away. He was rushed to hospital for emergency surgery with 4 broken ribs and a punctured lung…I personally think that story’s a load of Gobble-ty-gook. Every story does have a happy ending however, as the turkey is now in the guys freezer preparing for Xmas dinner.

Thursday 21st May sees the launch of a new comedy club i’ve organised in sunny Lurgan, Co. Armagh called Banter @ The Barista. I’ve got 10 comedians coming from all over the North for a champaigne reception, before mesmorising the audience into a urinary state of uncontrollable laughter, NI comics such as Micky Bartlett, Shane Todd and Dan Terrins together with humour-heavyweights Paddy McGaughey and my headliner, Jason O’Neill. If anyone wants an open-spot or thinks they can tickle the pits of a Lurgan crowd for cash in the future, get in contact with me at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it !

You can catch myself performing in Belfasts Laughter Lounge on Sat 23rd May, Letterkenny on Wed 27th, Comedy Dublin on Tue 2nd June and Masons Derry on Thurs 4th. Until then….

Sean Hegarty

It’s fine to smack children, as long as they’re not your own!

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